Kristus Sivertsen of the Twisted Party (Tp) is furious after McDonald’s was denied permission to build 700 new parking spaces

In 2023, the Smalltown council gave McDonald’s the go-ahead to build nine car parking spots, along with four spaces for trams outside the new “restaurant” on Slumber Island. The refusal to bump that up to 700 has sent Sivertsen into a full red-faced rant.

“Complete idiocy!” yells Kristus Sivertsen into the woods. Whether he’s yelling at the state administrator responsible for enforcing local decisions, or at the local politicians who made the rules in the first place, is unclear. What is clear: he’s very, very cranky.

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“Nine parking spaces? That’s a joke,” froths Sivertsen. “How hard can it be to build 700?”

Smalltown Magazine admits we’ve never built a parking lot. Not even one. So we don’t really have a strong opinion on that.

“If the council actually has to follow its own decisions, then what’s the point of politics?” adds Sivertsen, wiping foam from his mouth.

“But the Twisted Party voted for the original 9-spot plan in 2023,” we point out gently.

“‘For,’ sure,” groans Sivertsen. “But we had our fingers crossed. Doesn’t count.”

“One last thing,” we ask as he starts to storm off. “Is Halvdan your brother?”

“Don’t talk to me about my brother,” snaps Sivertsen. “He’s a socialist.”